When my sister’s boyfriend texted my Mum about his parents coming over during the weekend to merisik, I thought to myself, “Wah terror betul dia ni sampai message Mak aku semua.” My Dad was elated, my Mum had mixed feelings (because she wasn’t ready to let any of us ‘go’) and I, as per usual, sat in front of the TV watching Body of Proof while eating my caesar salad.
My sister and I have this rather special bond where we’d know if something wasn’t right with either one of us. After her boyfriend texted our Mum, she looked rather confused and kept saying, “Kenapa kanchiong sangat ni?”. My dad brushed it off by saying that perhaps she was excited and my Mum macam biasalah, “Korang please jangan tinggalkan Mama.” HAHA.
After the excitement died down, I went to her and asked if anything was wrong. The answer was simple – her boyfriend didn’t discuss anything with her.
So as a kakak, of course la I had to assure her that perkara yang baik tak boleh dilambat-lambatkan and most probably her boyfriend wanted this to be a surprise. Sometimes I surprise myself with the sound advice I give other people and when it comes to my own problems, menangis la, meraung la. Ah, I digress, sorry!
In a span of two weeks, Sissy and her boyfriend had discussed about one, how much the duit hantaran is going to be and two, how long they should be engaged. They decided that the former will be $XX,XXX and the latter being two years. So I thought, “Bagus la, settle the kettle already.” Since they have discussed, the guy’s family tinggal sampaikan to our family kan?
This part I would have to fast forward because my eyes are drooping and my bantal peluk suddenly so empuk.
The merisik day came. Sissy’s boyfriend’s parents came with an entourage of 10. Our family of course terperanjat beruk but maintained composure. I sat beside my sister and we started talking nonsense and weren’t paying attention at all….. Until their wakil started saying, “Boleh eh? boleh?”
It turned out that they didn’t know anything about the two-year arrangement and they had other plans regarding the duit hantaran.
Lets just say their plan was to have them engaged for three years with hantaran of $X,XXX. I am still confused at this juncture. Couple is supposed to discuss with each other dulu before sampaikan to their respective families kan? My sister is still mad upset la but my Mum cakap, kita pihak perempuan tk boleh bargain, tak manis nanti.
I am uncertain about merisik and melamar, etc. Before the other half’s family comes over in Dec, can my dear BTBs enlighten me on this?